The Planning Guide for Mothers
Planning that supports your life instead of competing with it
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For a long time, planning made me feel like I was failing before the year even started.
Every January, I would sit down with a notebook, a calendar, and good intentions, and try to map out a year that looked organised, productive, and balanced. And every year, something would interrupt those plans within weeks: illness, sleepless nights, emotional exhaustion, or simply the reality of caring for small, beautiful, adorable, incredible humans who need me more than any plan ever could.
Somewhere after my third child was born, I realised the problem wasn’t my discipline or my commitment. The problem was the kind of planning I was trying to force into a life that no longer worked that way.
So many things changed inside me and around me, that I wrote extensively about it here 👇
So I stopped planning to control the year and started planning to support it. And that’s what I want to share with you.
Planning as support
My life now moves in waves. Some weeks are full and energetic, while others are slow and quiet. Planning had to learn how to move with that reality instead of fighting it.
I began treating planning as a way to hold the season I was in, rather than a way to escape it. Does that make sense?
Instead of asking, What do I want to accomplish this year? I started asking, What does this season require from me?
And that small change in the question made a huge difference.
That shift changed everything.
One focus per month
The first change I made was simple: one focus per month.
Just one extra thing, layered gently on top of our normal routine.
Last November, my focus was organising my girls’ clothes. I have three girls, so you can imagine the amount of clothes involved and the weekly washing.
Besides the clothes in use, I had hand-me-downs moving from Miss 4 to Miss 3, from Miss 3 to Miss 1, plus second-hand clothes constantly coming from amazing friends.
So every little pocket of time I had, I went into their room and did something small:
taking items out for donation, packing away winter clothes (hello from hot Australia right now), separating stained clothes to give them more attention, throwing away socks that hadn’t seen their pair in a while, folding… and folding… and folding more clothes.
At the beginning, it felt like I was never getting it done.
But now, looking back, their clothes are so organised. Everything has its place. The next-size-up clothes are stored in containers, ready to be used when the time comes. Every sock has its pair.
Mornings flow better because the girls can find their clothes and dress themselves without help. And I’m no longer losing cute outfits for Miss 1 because she grows so fast and I forgot they existed.
In December, my focus was my health. It was transformative to say the least… and I’ll share more about that in another post.
This idea of one focus per month gave me freedom. I stopped feeling behind and started feeling present and I was actually getting things done.
Planning in themes instead of tasks
To-do lists still exist in my life, and I love them, but they no longer run it.
I plan in themes; like the example I shared in a recent note.
It gives me direction rather than pressure to tick something in a list.
Rhythms that adapt to real life
I rely on rhythms rather than fixed schedules.
Meals, rest, work, play… they all return each day, but never in exactly the same way So, when someone gets sick, when sleep disappears, when the house feels louder than usual, the rhythm still holds us.
And I don’t feel like I’ve failed because the structure bends instead of breaking.
That flexibility has kept me consistent much more rigid planning never did.
Leaving space on purpose
The most important part of my planning now is the space I leave empty.
As someone who loves doing things, sitting still on the couch in the middle of a Saturday afternoon is hard.
The last time I truly felt like I was doing “nothing,” I renovated my kids’ play kitchen and built a table for my living room 😂 I am that kind of person.
Now I understand that this empty space is protection. It’s where rest happens, but also where unexpected needs can be met without everything else collapsing.
Some days, that space becomes rest and other days, it becomes play, prayer, or catching up on something that was postponed.
Either way, it holds the day instead of overwhelming it.
What planning looks like now
My planning now happens in a much more relaxed way. I no longer try to plan the year in detail. I just plan the direction and trust myself to adjust as I go.
And strangely, I get more done this way because I’m no longer fighting my own life.
A different way to begin the year
If you’re starting this year feeling tired, unsure, or overwhelmed by expectations, I want you to know this: planning can serve you.
It doesn’t have to demand more from you than you can give.
Choose one focus for now and let your days move in a rhythm that fits your family’s current season.
💬 I’d love to know: what would your focus be this month? Comment below 👇 and lets share some ideas
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Photo by Karola G
I love your thoughts here, Ana. Having themes for each month is a great idea.
We are currently having a lovely warm winter here in Kansas, so my theme for Jan would probably be OUTSIDE because, oh the benefits of sunshine, fresh air...
Great post for this time of year, Ana! I’m sure it will inspire many of your readers, sweet friend!